Rock Euphoria

The Heroin Diaries: A Year In The Life of a Shattered Rock Star and its companion CD, The Heroin Diaries Soundtrack, chronicles the chaotic year prior to author Nikki Sixx’s 1987 overdose. The bulk of the book’s text is taken from the Motley Crue bassist/songwriter’s own personal diaries, beginning on Christmas Day, 1986 and ending with December 23rd, 1987, the day after his fatal injection of heroin and subsequent resurrection.

Receiving a co-writing credit on the book is rock journalist, Ian Gittins, assisting in the present-day interviews of figures mentioned in Sixx’s diaries. Chosen for his ability to wring the brutal truth out of his subjects, Gittins manages to pull some choice written-sound bytes from members of Motley Crue, Evangelist Denise Williams (formerly known as Vanity, Sixx’s one-time girlfriend), members of Nikki’s family, and other fixtures in his life during that turbulent year. Providing a well-rounded portrait, these people come clean with intriguing observations and frustrations with the person they knew 20 years ago.

Photographer and graphic artist Paul Brown is responsible for the eye-catching layout of the book. Rendered in high-gloss black, white, and red in a bold, graphic-intensive “splatter” style, the layout compliments the book nicely and provides a visual medium to display the random thoughts, scraps, interviews, and song lyrics scattered throughout.

The real meat-and-potatoes of the book, however, are Sixx’s diaries themselves. He captures himself at his best and his worst, as well as the double-edged sword of life on the road. An exercise in empathy, at times, you find yourself alternately rooting for him to beat his demons into submission and shaking your head as he slides back into deadly habits at various points throughout the book.

While the Nikki Sixx of 20 years ago comes off as something of a dick at times, he’s undoubtedly charismatic and possessed of a surprising lucidity in his thoughts — even while high as a kite. The Nikki Sixx of 1987 is the kind of guy you would want to hang out with, but only with extreme caution. On several occasions in the diaries, Sixx gives a play-by-play after shooting up, jotting down his drug-addled thoughts and offering the reader insight into the mind of an addict.

Contrasted with the sober Sixx of 2007 (who also contributes running commentary on his past exploits), it’s easy to see what a difference two decades make in terms of maturity and strength of character. A less pretentious version of the rockstar/humanitarian a la Bono, Sixx has found a mission in helping others by spilling his guts and ripping off the bandages of a painful period in his life in a down-to-earth, and easily accessible manner. Sixx certainly isn’t vying for sainthood, but he’s very real, raw, charismatic, and genuinely likeable.

Although it feels like it could have been written just yesterday, bearing in mind Sixx’s diary entries date back to 1987, The Heroin Diaries as a time capsule offers a glimpse back into the latter half of “The Me Decade.” Sixx and his cohorts give insight into life as a high-profile outsider during that period, bucking the Regan-era’s throwback to conservative values and heading up a faction bent on shocking the complacency out of America and the world.

Also touched upon is the rampant use of cocaine as the era’s drug of choice. Cocaine use comes across as almost the norm, not just among the rock n’ roll set, but even the straight-laced suits that surround the band. Nearly everyone in the book sniffs some snow. Whereas heroin is frowned upon, in this snapshot of 1987, cocaine use is treated with all the casualness of lighting a cigarette. The author’s bouts of despair also underscore the ’80s as the decade before Prozac and therapeutic mood-altering prescription drugs were widely accepted in treating depression.

Brought to life once again, are the ordeals of Sixx’s attempts to clean up, made all the more difficult not just by a wavering will and depression, but by relentless drug dealers unwilling to let a steady source of income go. The Heroin Diaries subtly hints at the behaviors of unspoken cries for help under the guise of merriment. Suddenly drunk/drugged dialing and room hopping don’t seem as innocent.

This book should be required reading for high school students, providing an educational and realistic portrait of drug abuse. On one hand, The Heroin Diaries shows what is so attractive about drugs. In a telling passage taken from his diaries, Sixx ponders “Heroes - why do we look up to them? Is it their music or their lifestyle? I’m 29 years old, they say you grow outta loving rock ‘n’ roll but it’s a huge part of me. It feels like music raised me, adopted me, saved my life.” With Sixx’s own admissions of a troubled childhood and feelings of abandonment peppering the text throughout, the book gives deeper evidence of addiction stemming from more than “wanting to be like the cool kids.” Loneliness, boredom, and depression — undiagnosed or otherwise — factor into an equation that proves Nancy Reagan’s solution to “Just Say NO!” isn’t as simple or effective as you may like to believe. In doing so, the book deglamourizes drug use and gives great detail as to what happens mentally and physically as a result of addiction, the physical affects of shooting up and mixing drugs, and the brutality of eventual withdrawal.

The paperback version of The Heroin Diaries will be released on October 28, 2008. Nikki Sixx will be donating 25% of its proceeds to his charity, Running Wild in the Night, in conjunction with Covenant House, helping to keep runaway and abused kids off the streets.